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Imo set out one day to catch some fish, but there was no sea. There was nothing but Imo. So he spat in his hands and rubbed them together and made a ball of sea. After that he made some fish, but they were stupid and lazy. So he took the souls of some dolphins, who at least had learned to speak, and he mixed them with the clay and rubbed them in his hands and changed their shape and they became people. They were clever but they could not swim all day, so Imo dug some more clay and rubbed it in his hands and baked it in the fire of his fishing camp, and that was how land was made.

Soon the people filled all the lands and were hungry, so Imo took some of the night and rubbed it in his hands and made Locaha, the god of death.

Still Imo was not satisfied, and he said: I have been like a child playing in the sand. This is a flawed world. I had no plan. Things are wrong. I will rub it in my hands and make a better one.

   But Locaha said: The mud is set. People will die.

   Imo was angry and said: Who are you to question me?

   And Locaha said: I am part of you, as are all things.

So I say to you, Give me the mortal world, and go and make your better one. I will rule here fairly. When a human dies, I will send them to be a dolphin until it is time for them to be born again. But when I find a creature who has striven, who has become more than the mud from which they were made, who has glorified this mean world by being a part of it, then I will open a door for them into your perfect world and they will no longer be creatures of time for they will wear stars.

Imo thought this was a good idea, because it was his own creation, and went off to make his new world in the sky. But before he did this, and so that Locaha would not have things all his own way, he breathed into his hands and made the other gods so that while the people should die, it would be in their right time.

And this is why we are born in water, and do not kill dolphins, and look towards the stars.

Terry Pratchett  -  “Nation”



lord vetinari’s intense hatred of mimes keeps me going sometimes


We heard a song — it went “Twinkle twinkle little star…” What power! What wondrous power! You can take a billion trillion tons of flaming matter, a furnace of unimaginable strength, and turn it into a little song for children!

- Terry Pratchett, A Hat Full of Sky (via proudtortoise) -
‘You know what the greatest tragedy is in the whole world?’ said Ginger, not paying him the least attention. ‘It’s all the people who never find out what it is they really want to do or what it is they’re really good at. It’s all the sons who become blacksmiths because their fathers were blacksmiths. It’s all the people who could be really fantastic flute players who grow old and die without ever seeing a musical instrument, so they become bad ploughmen instead. It’s all the people with talents who never even find out. Maybe they are never even born in a time when it’s even possible to find out.’

She took a deep breath. ‘It’s all the people who never get to know what it is they can really be. It’s all the wasted chances.’

- Terry Pratchett, Moving Pictures (via sockich) -


Trying to kick some bad art block with Tiffany Aching doodles.


Cheery is really so important though, because she literally grew up in a society where there was literally only one gender, and she knew that she was definitely not that gender, she was a woman, and in part because of her friendship with Angua, she asserted herself as a woman.

She threw out their single-gender system and asserted a gender that didn’t even exist in their culture, a gender which matched how she felt and who she was. 

She literally said to all of Dwarfdom “no, I am not a man, I will not hide who I am, I am a woman. Not any woman, though, but a dwarf woman” and kicked that cissexist garbage to The King’s dump where it belonged. And even after pissing off almost all of Dwarfdom, she continued to kick it into shape with her spike-toed high-heeled boots and looked rocking while doing it.

Cheery is so, so, so important, and I thank Terry Pratchett every day for giving her to all of us.

And they believed that for things to exist they had to have a position in time and space. Humanity had arrived as a nasty shock. Humanity practically was things that didn’t have a position in time and space, such as imagination, pity, hope, history and belief. Take those away and all you had was an ape that fell out of trees a lot.

- Thief of Time by Terry Pratchett (via thehistorymonks) -
His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools — the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans — and summed up all three of them in his famous phrase, ‘You can’t trust any bugger further than you can throw him, and there’s nothing you can do about it, so let’s have a drink.

- Terry Pratchett (Small Gods) -
Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.

- Terry Pratchett (Jingo) -
Discworld is story, humor, and philosophy all in one. Nowhere else have I been made to laugh so much while being forced to think so much, all while being given a wonderful plot.

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